This blog of mine comes after a really long time. I should attribute the reasons for it to lack of time (well to be frank, more laziness than the lack of time) and not having felt of really writing something about a thought provoking subject.
I am going to write today in response to a blog I read of a certain Sumedh Munjee's Why I left India Again.
I do have a small experience of being an indian living in another country apart from India for a sizable amount of time. To be more precise, Sumedh's very own United States. What makes me really get up and write about the subject is the fact that there are somethings that our american author here has conveniently forgotten or maybe they have never occurred to him in the first place.
My first impression of the blog is of a confused individual who really doesn't know what he wants. Though provoking for sure (+1 for his writing.) but a really random rambling of trying to explain his decision to himself!
Firstly having expectations and excitement of leaving the US because of the idea of a new and vibrant "Thomas Friedman's India" or the fact that a certain George W Bush is the president of USA is not good enough. What makes a person really want to come back is the fact that he wants to be closer to his family, or culture or really thinks he is an alien in his existing country. There are people I know, who have settled outside of India and are very happy. The key to being happy in any country or place for that matter is to start becoming a part of that place's culture. You can either be a part of it or you can't. That is the only decision to make. Yes, you can continue staying for a few more years, even a lot more years for material reasons, but if you can't be a part of the culture, you will always be unhappy. Not once has our friend mentioned the emotional aspect of the decision. He claims his move to India was a success by any metric, but really what he used to measure was only the materialist viewpoint. As a result in 2 years he felt left out and wanted to return. Had he taken the decision to move back, based on the fact that he cannot adjust to the culture in the US and turn American, he would have never wanted to return. With his state of mind, at the time, he should have never moved in the first place, because he was expecting the wrong things out of 'his' India. He did not have to worry about his kid's opinion as she was only just starting preschool, so it was actually all the more easier to make a decision.
Another reason, of why he felt the way he felt after coming back was because again, he did not try to become part of the culture in India. OK, its hard to believe but lets just say he was away from India for 11 years so he forgot India's culture and way of living. The point I am trying to make here is that when you go the US for the first time, you will very quickly stop at every single red STOP sign on the road, see a ridiculously high amounts of formal 'thank you's and 'sorry's creep into your language. You will start writing colour as color, neighbour as neighbor, the date in the mm/dd/yyyy format and celebrate Thanksgiving to try and adjust in the new country. The same way why not do it when you come back. Its just like relocating to any other country, only a lot easier, because it your own country. Buying Pizzas, getting irritated at traffic, having a attitude that every freaking eatable is unhygienic in India is not going to help. That is what India is. If you want Friedman's India, then you have to also deal with these things. Its like trying to live in India with an american lifestyle.
Finally, he says he now knows where he belongs, but still asks for that Koh-i-noor to be returned to 'his own' India. Just perfectly shows his chronic confused ameobiasis.
Maybe he should watch 'Hindi movie' Lakshya, and ponder... 'Main aisa kyun hoon' and he will get all those seemingly difficult answers.
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